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) Does her profile say she’s a lesbian and you’re a straight guy with a weakness for Justin Bieber haircuts?

Sorry pal, but she’s not gonna be into you, no matter how hard her floppy hair makes you.

I’ve been documenting OKCupid atrocities for a while now, and a lot of themes crop up in the terrible messages that daters send me for, um, critiquing.

So respond to what’s in their profile and ask a question or two. ___If you've got your own online dating horror stories, drop them below, or submit them anonymously.

Struggling to think of the right thing to say to an attractive match?

The beauty of internet dating is that we all get to specify what we want.

Respect that and don’t waste anyone’s time – including your own.

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